Monday, October 24, 2011

Fall

I finally have a little downtime to post something. I didn't realize that it's been five months since my last post! Not too much has been going on, really. I have been staying busy with work, and I try to find a little bit of time each week to do some photography. I am working on a time lapse project that I will post on here once it is finished, but until then, here are a few pictures.


On Shoreline Trail -- a friend and I decided to go on a little photo walk through Millcreek Canyon and then up on Shoreline Trail.


In Millcreek Canyon -- apparently this part was actually private property (owned by the Boy Scouts), but there weren't any signs and the gates were open.


Another leaf--I was goofing off with the color hues between these two leaves, trying to see which style I liked better


Alpine Loop, looking towards Sundance.


John Deere tractor in Winnemucca, Nevada. I still need to send my sister a print of this one...


Taylorsville Days -- I wish I would have gone back about ten minutes later, when the lights on the Ferris wheel came on.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Going Home


As my brother and I drove up to the house, I thought that it was a good day. Dark clouds hovered over the valley, and the forecast called for rain. But off to the west over the lake, the clouds ended abruptly. The sun was setting triumphantly, seeming to mock the clouds with its glory. We were going to visit my grandfather, my abuelito. I secretly wished that he would pass away that evening, that his suffering would end and that I could hold on to the memory of that sunset as the day Guelito died.

We went around the house and came in through the downstairs. The door creaked loudly, and a dozen faces turned to look at us. Many of them were teary-eyed, and a few gave us a half-smile, a type of “Good to see you, glad you could make it,” even though we all would have liked to be reuniting under better circumstances.

Our parents were at the head of Guelito’s bed, and we moved our way through hugs and handshakes until we reached them. Dad is a doctor, and it was nice to know that he was there--I think a lot of people appreciated having him there, giving a few words of medical advice and helping everyone know a little of what was going on.

My grandmother Guelita was also at the head of the bed, holding Guelito’s hand. She would lean over occasionally to talk to him and kiss him on the forehead. Several boxes of tissues and a wastebasket were close-by, ready for anyone that might need them. The wastebasket was already halfway full of wadded up tissues and sanitary wipes.

After hugging Guelita and my parents, I finally got a good look at Guelito. His eyes were closed, and his mouth hung slightly open. Tubing carried oxygen into his nose, but the few breaths he was taking were going through his mouth. He was chain-stoking--that’s what my dad called it. Two or three big breaths, followed by few shallow breaths. I had to look it up to know that it was a cycle of breathing often associated with heart failure, as the body fluctuates between apnea and hyperpnea.

I patted his shoulder and kissed him on the head, and he continued to lay motionless. After visiting with everyone for a little while, my brother and I passed through another round of hugs and handshakes and drove home.

I set my phone next to my bed, fully expecting to receive a phone call sometime in the night with the news of Guelito’s passing. The next morning, Tuesday, I ran upstairs and turned my phone on and off, just to make sure I didn’t miss any messages. Guelito was still there.

I drove to work in a rainstorm. The clouds from the day before had continued moving in, and everything was gray and dreary. When I was just a few minutes away from work, it started to snow. In May. I secretly wished that Guelito wouldn’t pass away that day, that I could have a better memory of his passing than some freak snow flurry in late spring.

The snow reminded me of New York City, and remembering the city made me remember when my Guelito almost passed away. I had been in New York City the previous summer working on my master’s degree. Guelito had another bout of poor health and ended up in the hospital, and the phone calls from my mom and dad let me know that he was expected to pass away at any time. I told my manager there in New York about what was going on, and that I might need to step out to take a phone call. She asked if I wanted to take the day off of work. I thought about it for a brief moment, but I turned down the offer. Most of my family was back in Utah, and there wasn’t anything for me to do if I was just at my apartment by myself. A few hours later I received a phone call from my mom, and I started getting choked up even before I answered. I stepped into the break area, and my mom said, “Here’s Guelito. Tell him you love him.” I managed to force the words out, and I heard him saying something in return. My mom had to translate the Spanish. “He said, ‘I love you too,’ and he’s going home. He’s going home...” I ran to the nearest bathroom and cried for several minutes, trying to get it all out. I washed my face and went back to work, and my manager asked me again if I wanted to take the day off. I shook my head, insisting that I needed to stay busy.

That night was one of the worst nights I have ever experienced, and I haven’t told many people about it. I had my cell phone close at hand, waiting for the final call. I lived by myself in a studio apartment there in New York, and being all alone got the better of me. I became emotional in a way that I never knew was possible. I sobbed uncontrollably for more than an hour, and at times it felt like I was hyperventilating. I remember sitting on the edge of my bed with my feet on the floor, rocking back and forth and hugging my shoulders, wishing more than anything for someone to comfort me.

And then he went and got better! I still don’t know whether his telling me that he was “going home” meant that he was dying, or whether it meant that he was actually getting better and leaving the hospital.

That was last summer, and this time felt different. He wasn’t going to get better.

Tuesday night, it was my turn to stay by his bedside. Everyone expected him to pass that night, and I was secretly terrified. How often do I need to check on him, how will I know, who do I wake up, who do I call? And worst of all, what if I go through all that and I make a mistake? What if he’s still there, and I’m causing a fuss waking everyone up and making everyone emotional for a false alarm?

Guelita wanted to stay with him throughout the night, but people talked her out of it. Dad told her, “We have one sick person, and we don’t need two...” I don’t remember who it was, but somebody talked her into at least leaving Guelito to take a shower. After getting cleaned up, Guelita realized how tired she really was and finally decided to go to bed.

One of my aunts and one of my cousins decided to stay up, and what a blessing that was. It was nice having someone to talk to, but above all, I knew that I wasn’t alone. If Guelito passed during the night, there would be somebody else there, and I would be okay. We talked throughout the night, pausing every once in awhile when we heard a hesitation in Guelito’s breathing. Was that it? Is he gone? But his breathing would continue, and we’d continue talking--whispering, really. It was an unspoken agreement that we would all speak in hushed tones, as if Guelito were only sleeping and we didn’t want to wake him...

His breathing grew shallower as the night wore on. My aunt kept telling me that I could go ahead and rest, that Guelito still had another few hours at least, but I didn’t want to leave. I reached under the blanket and held his hand for awhile. Early in the morning, he started to grow restless. He would pull his hand away and try to raise himself up, as if he were trying to move himself. We wanted to roll him a little, to let him rest on a different side, but my aunt said she wasn’t supposed to move him unless he’d been given morphine--and we didn’t have the morphine. So we sat there throughout the night, wincing whenever he would moan and try to move himself, the furrows in his brow indicating that he was in some pain.

When morning came, morphine was finally administered. Before he had slipped into unconsciousness, he had told others that he didn’t want to be given any morphine. We felt that a balance was reached between honoring his wishes and not letting him suffer. At 6:00am, I went out to buy bagels and muffins. I was groggy from being up all night, but I wanted the chance to just be by myself for little while. My aunt stayed with Guelito, and she gave me directions to the nearest bakery.

It was raining again when I stepped outside, but I ignored it. I didn’t have an umbrella, and I can’t control the weather, so what’s the use making a fuss about something that is out of your hands?

More aunts and uncles showed up, and with everyone else around, I knew that I could leave. I was exhausted from all of the emotional and physical turmoil, and I decided to rest for a little while before heading back home. Maybe that’s what Guelito was doing, lying there in his bed during his final moments. He’d had a long and fulfilling life, and after all that, maybe he just wanted to rest before finally going home.

I got back to my apartment and fell asleep immediately. I didn’t hear when my roommates got home, or when my brother walked into the room after he got back from work. The only thing I heard was the phone call that woke me up a few minutes after 5:00pm--he was gone.

I stepped outside to get better reception as I called my sisters to let them know. It was still raining, but it was a good day; it was the day Guelito went home.

Going home. That’s the name of the song that they want playing during a video presentation at his funeral. My uncle’s going to give me the pictures, and I’m going to work on creating a slideshow with one of my cousins. I found another song to use as well. It’s a lullaby. I think the two songs will go well together; one speaks of going home, and the other about sleeping peacefully.

Come to me, O child beloved,
Eyes of wonder softly close,
Tiny hand release my finger,
Weary head receive repose.
Sleep, and love arises in me,
Waking hope till joy o'erflows.
Lead me, little child so tender,
To the place I long to go.

Rest in me, O child beloved,
May thy sweet dreams never cease:
Till I hear around us winging
Seraphs singing heavenly peace.
Then I'll walk through night and shadow
By the light that shines in thee,
Flowing as a stream forever
To the blessed, fruitful Tree.
Singing heavenly peace forever.
Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Festival of Colors

I finally got around to posting these pictures here, even though this all happened last week. I went down to the Festival of Colors with my brother and some friends. The festival is held every year to kind of usher in spring, and it involves throwing a ton of colored chalk around. We showed up, threw some chalk, walked around for a few minutes, and then went to get something to eat. I think we only stayed for twenty to thirty minutes or so. But hey, I'd never done it, even though TONS of people from BYU go each year. Anyway, so here are some pictures--



This is me just before getting into the car. The gray shirt over my should was the one I had been wearing the whole time, so this is my second layer of clothes.


Andrea, shortly after the chalk started getting thrown around


My bro

Our group--we did try to clean up before going to the restaurant, but we still looked pretty bad. I feel bad for the white tablecloth at our table...

Ian

My brother's hands, overlooking the festival

After the festival

Right when they started the color throwing--I had my camera inside a ziploc bag, with electrical tape sealing up every opening. Only the front of the lens was exposed, and I even put a SECOND ziploc bag over everything. I'm glad I did, because there were quite a few cameras that got destroyed from all the dust--


The colors really are that flourescent

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Junkyard

My roommate recently bought a used car, but he wanted to get a few parts for it. He decided to take a trip to the junkyard, and I tagged along just to take a few pictures. It was kind of interesting just looking at all of the old cars, trying to picture what had happened.


Tire


Some cars looked like they had collided with a telephone pole, with the front part of the car completely twisted and deformed. Others looked like someone had died in them (okay, so some of the deployed airbags could have come from people hacking at the dashboard, stripping it for parts---it was still eerie though). One car looked like it had bullet holes through the windshield.


Rows of Junk


I just thought it was interesting, since it was only the second junkyard I've ever been to. This one was organized into rows, and you could look up on their online database which car model you're looking for. The only other junkyard I've been to was back in Georgia, and there was no organization whatsoever. That junkyard only had dirt roads that always seemed muddy, and cars were stacked one on top of the other and off to the side---anywhere there was room, really. And the "database" was the owner, who just knew which cars were on his lot, and he had a pretty good idea of what parts were still available. If you called on a slow day, he'd even strip out the parts you needed for the chance of earning a tip.


Finding the right piece


And my roommate decided to dress like a hobo for the occasion, which meant wearing 3D glasses just for the heck of it.

I just found the junkyard to be both unsettling and fascinating. It was interesting to see people finding a mini treasure trove of parts that they needed, but on another level, it almost feels like legalized grave robbing (not that I would know what grave robbing feels like...although we did stumble upon an old slave graveyard out in the woods in Georgia. One of the graves was open, and we could see a skeleton inside. We kept daring each other to climb in--nobody did, but it still makes for a random icebreaker in a conversation to throw that out there).

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Lighting Class

So I just got back from a creative lighting workshop at Pictureline, and it was a blast. The workshop was led by Paul Van Allen, a Nikon rep who travels the country, teaching people how to use their Nikon gear. I was never a fan of flash photography, simply because I always felt that it was too harsh, washing out details and looking unnatural--well after tonight, I have completely changed my mind. Paul taught us how to set our cameras to trigger wireless flashes, and then we actually got hands on experience going to different stations. Each of the pictures below were ones that I took, but they are all based on lighting set-ups and compositions that Paul has displayed on his flickr account. The only exception was the water drop--that was taken with a camera that was already set up on a tripod (I believe that camera was a D300s), and I just had to put my memory card in. I still had to time the picture just right though. Anyway, here are the pictures--

The paint brush was clamped to a wooden dowel, with a bucket of lime green paint underneath. Right before taking the picture, you simply lift the bucket up to the brush to get the angle, and then time the shot to get a nice drip. I missed getting a drop of paint suspended in the air, but I still thought it was pretty cool.

Gumballs


Everyone was trying to get a perfectly suspended drop of water, but the line at this station was starting to get backed up. So I settled for this shot instead--I kind of like how the water is glassy smooth instead of rippling the way you normally see with shots of water droplets.

We all loved this station. And once you know how to do it, all sorts of possibilities just start to open up--I'm going to have a lot of fun with this stuff...

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Sugar House - Time Lapse

I shot this video in Sugar House Park this past Thursday. I wanted to try and take advantage of the cloudy skies for some flat lighting. Anyway, I'm just getting a feel for the video on my new camera--I'm pretty impressed with it so far, and I'm looking forward to working on some different projects throughout these upcoming weeks (and try something outside of Sugar House Park). Feel free to leave your comments.


Sugar House Park - Winter from Jon on Vimeo.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Shoreline Trail

I was finally able to upload another time lapse test--this is from Shoreline Trail at the mouth of Emigration Canyon. And I apologize for the flicker...shooting a high contrast scene like that can cause some very tiny fluctuation in shutter speed with so many pictures, which produces a flicker when you play them back like this. Let me know what you think--



Shoreline Trail - time Lapse from Jon on Vimeo.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Valley

I went out yesterday afternoon to try and do some more time lapse experiments. I started heading up Emigration Canyon, but then I saw Shoreline Trail and decided to just walk up there. It was really muddy, but there were a lot of people still jogging on the trail. I thought everything looked great in-camera, and I didn't realize that you could get so much flicker while shooting time lapse--I'm still trying to read up on how to prevent that in the future.

Anyway, I'll post the time lapse test once it's finished uploading, but in the meantime, here's a picture I took while I was heading back down the trail. The temperature dropped a good 25 degrees or so once the sun went down, and I was in a bit of a rush to get back to my car. But I saw this tree with Salt Lake City behind it, and I figured it wouldn't hurt to take a quick picture. Luckily my camera was still on my tripod, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to set anything up since my hands were completely numb from the cold. Enjoy.


Valley Tree

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Time Lapse Test

Well the job hunt is still on-going, but I'm hoping something will come up soon. I've been applying and turning in resumes, and I've had a couple of interviews. Some of the places weren't hiring immediately though and won't be making a decision until the 2nd week in February. I'm not just sitting around waiting for them to call me back, but it would be nice to least know for sure...

In other news, I've been having a lot of fun with my new camera. Just recently I did some time lapse tests, and I tried to post the video here, but I don't know if it will load right or not. It was just of some geese down in Sugar House Park. I set my camera up to take a picture every three seconds, and then decided to play it back at eight frames a second. So nothing spectacular going on, just a few things moving in and out of the frame, but I'm still learning how to do it. Let me know what you guys think (or better yet, leave suggestions of something you would like to see done in time lapse...). And the clip should be able to play full-screen, but if not, click on the "vimeo" button.



Sugar House - Time Lapse from Jon on Vimeo.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Some pictures, and The Sandpit

Okay, just a quick post for now. I'm still job hunting, but something will come up. I had a couple of interviews, but both places are still evaluating different people--actual hiring won't occur for another week or two, so I'm not sure if I'd even be offered a job at those places. And I try to keep busy working on projects and some photography. Just a couple of pictures below--


Busy, busy, busy -- I messed up taking this picture and didn't blur the ground enough, so the background is really distracting. I decided to have fun with it anyway and ran it through the "Creative - Split Tone 4" preset in Lightroom. I thought the warning label was interesting, seeing as how I didn't even know it was there until I loaded the picture up on my computer screen.


Same park, different swingset. That's about it.

Again, another picture with a busy background. The tree on the left just makes the picture feel crowded to me.


But here's something that is far more interesting. This is a short film called "The Sandpit" by a photographer named Sam O'Hare. It looks like it was all shot with miniatures, but it is just the way it was shot and processed that makes it look that way. He shot it entirely with a still camera, taking pictures at 4 frames per second, and then he edited it together afterwards (I believe he mentioned in an interview that he took around 35,000 pictures just for this project...). To get the full effect, click "Play" and then hit the full-screen button (it looks like square made up of four arrows pointing away from each other)--it should play in HD. Watch until the end--the whole thing is just fascinating.


The Sandpit from Sam O'Hare on Vimeo.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Hi-res

Hmm, for some reason the other post didn't let you click to see a hi-res image for the two pictures below. Hopefully this post works--





New York --> Utah

Talk about a hectic semester. After looking at my situation there in New York, I came to the decision that I had to move back to Utah once I finished my master's program. I decided this in the last week or so of November...and I finished my classes in December. So the last month was extremely chaotic, trying to balance school, work, and moving. I was also in the middle of applying to Ph.D. programs. On top of that, I started dating someone in the first part of December, and I was trying to find a way to spend time with her with everything else that was going on.

Anyway, I survived. And I hope I never have to pull another all-nighter ever again...Things got so rushed near the end that I had to pull four all-nighters back-to-back (I do NOT recommend this by any means). But it's over and done now. I've moved back to Utah, and I'm just waiting to hear back from the various Ph.D. programs (I'm looking for work in the meantime). At least I have time now to actually take some pictures and update my blog.


A passenger leaving the subway at Columbus Circle. I think it's interesting how this picture came out. I didn't have a tripod with me, so I had my camera propped up on a railing. I wanted to try and isolate a single person right as they were heading up the stairs. Even though this was at the end of the workday, to me it seems as if this man is just getting ready to face the city again.

Columbus Circle again.

Right by my parent's house. I was just testing out my new camera. If I could take the picture again, I would have tried to frame out all of the houses and the fence. But whatever--I didn't want to go tromping through someone's yard just to get closer.

Again, just testing out my new camera. I really like the amount of detail it can pick up (if you zoom in, you can see all of the paint flecks and pits on the hydrant's surface)

This is literally right in front of my new house in Salt Lake City. Sure, there have been countless images of trees silhouetted against a sunset--I just haven't done any myself :)


And yesterday I went up to Red Butte Gardens just above the University of Utah. It was interesting how the garden was still fun to walk around in, even though everything was brown and decaying.

Red Butte Gardens again


Last one from Red Butte Gardens. I'll have to head back in the spring/summer, when everything is in bloom. There was just something appealing about a dead garden--

Anyway, leave a comment and let me know what you think. I should be able to keep this more up to date without an insane amount of deadlines--